Relationship Quotes Cocktail Napkins

Cotton Cocktail Napkins with 25 Unique Quotes

Each set contains 2 quotes of each 

4.5” x 4.5”  - 50 Napkins

• "I used to be in a relationship... but I'm much better now."
  
• "Current relationship status: Sleeping diagonally across a king size bed."
  
• "Date someone who gives you the same feeling of when you see food coming at a restaurant."
  
• "If you text "I love you" and the person sends back and emoji, no matter what that emoji is, they don't love you back."
  
• "As someone flailing in my own relationships, allow me to offer you some advice."
  
• "I'll never join an online dating service. I prefer to meet someone the old fashioned way...through alcohol and poor judgement."
  
• "Relationship Status: Table for one, drinks for two."
  
• "As a man in a relationship, you have a choice; You can be right or you can be happy."
  
• "The Olympics have lasted longer than any of my relationships."
  
• "Dating after 30 is easy. It's like riding a bike. But the bike is on fire, the ground is on fire and you are riding through hell."
  
• "I never make the same mistake twice. I make it five or six times... just to be sure."
  
• "I'm no longer dating. If you're interested in me, I need a 500 word essay on how you will not waste my time."
  
• "Relationships are like a walk in the park... Jurassic Park."
  
• "People ask me... Why are you single? You're attractive, intelligent, and creative. My reply is "I'm overqualified.""
  
• "If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the questions."
  
• "Relationships give us a reason to live... revenge!"
  
• "The key to a successful relationship is to clear your internet history."
  
• "My price is not coming on a white horse... He's obviously riding a turtle and is lost."
  
• "A relationship lasts longer when Facebook doesn't know about it."
  
• "I'm too old for Netflix and chill...now I want Amazon Prime and commitment."
  
• "I want someone to look at me the way I look at chocolate cake."
  
• "Before you begin a relationship with someone let them use a computer with slow internet to see who they really are."
  
• "My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don't really know me."
  
• "I don't need a relationship. I need a million dollars and a fast metabolism."
  
• "If you love someone, set them free...but keep their Netflix password."
  
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