Inappropriate Thoughts Quotes Cocktail Napkins

Cotton Cocktail Napkins with 25 Unique Quotes

Each set contains 2 quotes of each 

4.5” x 4.5”  - 50 Napkins

• "It's not that I don't like you. Oh wait...yes it is."
  
• "When your ex says, "You'll never find anyone like me again." I tell him, "That's the point you idiot." "
  
• "The best way to hang up on someone is in the middle of your own sentence. That way they never suspect you hung up on them."
  
• "I'm not really a control freak. But...can I show you the right way to do that??"
  
• "Why do people always ask... 'What the Hell were you thinking?'"
  
• "I don't have an attitude problem. You have a problem with my attitude and that's not my problem."
  
• "When people say "You will regret that in the morning" I sleep until noon because I am a problem solver."
  
• "It would of course have to look like an accident."
  
• "People say I go out of my way to upset others. I say it isn't out of my way at all."
  
• "I'm not arguing, I am explaining why I'm correct."
  
• "I really appreciate the time you took today to remind me why I don't like you."
  
• "I was hoping for a battle of wits, but you appear to be unarmed."
  
• "Yes, your opinion matters. But not to me."
  
• "All I know is one of us is right and the other one is you."
  
• "I'm sure whatever you have to say can wait until you're smarter."
  
• "You're not totally useless, you could be used as a bad example."
  
• "I got called "pretty" today! Well, actually the full statement was "You're pretty annoying..." But I only focus on positive things."
  
• "I have been putting a lot of thought into it. I don't think being an adult is going to work out for me."
  
• "Hating people takes way too much energy. I just pretend they are dead."
  
• ""Screw it"...my last thought before making most decisions."
  
• "Life is all about perspective... The sinking of the Titanic was a miracle for all the lobsters who escaped from the ship's kitchen."
  
• "When I get to work, I always hide, because a good worker is hard to find."
  
• "Life Hack:  Did you know that if you text your boss "Go stuff yourself," you won't have to go to work anymore?"
  
• "I'm giving up drinking for a month...sorry, bad punctuation. I'm giving up. Drinking for a month."
  
• "The trouble with trouble is it starts out as being fun!"
  
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